Top 5 things you can do for a healthy marriage, happily ever after doesn’t just happen. Effort is required. You really think your grandparents had it easy every single day? Nope some days were better than other but they made the effort and here are what experts say we should be trying to do…
- Support each other in the simplest of ways. Celebrate the other person’s successes and commiserate with them on their failures. When your partner tells you about their day, look up; engage. That is the hardest one for me to do but having tried it lately I am noticing a huge improvement.
- Turn towards each other. This might mean reading something you find amusing out loud from a meme or pointing to something interesting out of the window. How your partner responds is important. If they turn towards you and acknowledge you with a ‘That’s interesting’ or something like that it is a good thing. But if they ignore you or saying ‘Stop droning on’ that is clearly a bad thing.
- Take an interest in your partner’s world. Remember what they were concerned about yesterday and ask about it. Know each other’s goals, worries and hopes.
- Be kind to each other. Kindness is the opposite of contempt. It can be what you would do for company but not for the person you live with?!? Help out with the cooking, when asked, even if you are feeling tired. It is also resisting the urge to say something destructive just because you are disagreeing about something.
- Solve your problems. Bring them up when both of you are in a positive frame of mind and without the preconception that your idea of a solution is the only possible way to fix the problem. It almost always involves compromise and being tolerant of each other’s faults.
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