Cracking Man Code: Is He FLIRTING? Or Just Being Nice?

MALE FLIRTING SIGNAL #1 - He stands with his hands on his hips

If a guy is into you, he takes a very particular stance. He stands with his hands on his hips, his shoulders back, and his legs apart.

And to honest, most guys don’t even know they’re doing it.  Men do this subconsciously because it makes them look bigger, which in their mind means more appealing to you.


MALE FLIRTING SIGNAL #2 - He’ll start fussing with his clothes

If you notice a man adjusting his clothing as he’s getting ready to approach you or even while talking with you, this is him trying to look nice in your presence!

Trust me, even men who care a lot about their appearance don’t care about it enough to fidget with their clothing in public… unless they’re into you!


MALE FLIRTING SIGNAL #3 - He raises his eyebrows and smiles

Here's ANOTHER subconscious gesture! We men, when we want to impress or connect with someone, we just naturally raise our eyebrows and smile. We may even say something like, “Oh my gosh, that’s amazing,” as we do this, to show we’re emphatically engaged with you.


MALE FLIRTING SIGNAL #4 - He’s way too excited about things you have in common

When a guy is into you he’ll get WAYYY too animated and excited when he finds out you two have something in common, even if it’s just a little thing.  It's cool if you have things in common, but also, he sees an opportunity--an entryway--to keep talking to you!


MALE FLIRTING SIGNAL #5 - He will use any excuse to get close to you

If he’s trying to get into closer proximity to you, he’s flirting! Maybe you’re in a crowded, noisy room, so he pulls you closer and says, “Hey, hey, come what are you doing this weekend?” This creates a deliberate moment of intimacy between you.


MALE FLIRTING SIGNAL #6 - He seeks out physical contact with you

This one is similar to #5 in that it’s instinctual for us guys to want to be close to you when we’re into you. So maybe he’ll gently touch your arm or hand, or maybe he’ll put his hand on your back as he’s opening a door for you. These are sure signs he’s flirting and NOT just being nice!


MALE FLIRTING SIGNAL #7 - He’ll try to extend the conversation with you

So, usually, with men, the most important thing to us in a conversation is to get to the point.  What’s the punchline? What exactly are we resolving or fixing? Where are we meeting? The end.

Our brains are literally programmed to cut to the chase, fix situations, and move on.  But… when he’s flirting with you, he’ll try to extend the conversation. He’ll ask questions or prompt follow-ups by saying things like, “That’s so interesting, tell me more about that!” or “What happened next??”


MALE FLIRTING SIGNAL #8 - He’ll dig to find out if you’re dating anyone

If he’s doing any investigating about your relationship status, he’s flirting. He may say something like, “Hey, so that concert you went to last weekend… did you go with a guy or just your girlfriends or who did you go with?"  Or he’ll be even a little more direct and say something to the effect of, “Hey, so how’s it going on Tinder? I bet you’re getting hit up by a ton of guys, huh?”

Men who are interested want to find out your availability and who their competition is. If you’re not dating anyone, there’s a door of possibility open to them!


MALE FLIRTING SIGNAL #9 - He’ll try to protect you and anticipate your needs

Some might call this being chivalrous. He’ll pull out a chair for you, he’ll offer you his jacket if you're cold - that kind of thing. He may even go above and beyond and make sure to walk on the outside of the sidewalk, protecting you from traffic, or offer to hold your purse.

If a man is doing these kinds of things, he is most definitely trying to please you, which is a huge sign he’s interested in you.


MALE FLIRTING SIGNAL #10 - He zones out when he’s talking to you

I know it sounds weird. Zoning out? That means he’s bored and most certainly not into you, right?  Well, actually, not so much. Think about it. When you’re talking to a man, where is he looking? Into your eyes! And it’s scientifically proven that locking eyes builds connection and attraction. So, if he’s listening to you and gazing into your eyes, and he realizes that he finds you beautiful, he’s going to start focusing on that.

So you may be tellin’ him all about your mama’s amazing lasagna recipe or your favorite workout, and he’s genuinely interested, but he’s got a whole second dialogue going on in his head: “Man she’s beautiful. Wow, she’s cool. I want to kiss her. What should I say next?”

You may even ask him a question and he’ll seem to have just snapped back to reality or to be confused.This is because he’s so into you that’s he’s transfixed by you! Men get nervous and vulnerable too, which is why flirting can be hard to distinguish!

All men would love to believe that they’re Mr. Suave, that they’re cool as a cucumber around you. But the thing is, when they’re into you, they often can’t hide it, but their attraction comes off like awkwardness, plain friendliness, or even distraction.


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